I can’t wait.
I can’t wait.
You weren’t always the nicest guy. Perhaps you never learned how to say please and thank you until the very end but you had a good run. You made yourself out of nothing. Experienced countries, adventures and troubles that only you got yourself into. You did whatever the fuck you wanted no matter who thought you were a loon. Maybe because you thought life was bullshit too? Who knows. I’m glad you died in your chair by the fireplace, the most comfortable place that you nested out for yourself in this world. I don’t think your spirit is living on, I don’t think you’re in heaven or in hell. So goodbye, thanks for letting me recklessly drive a car at 10 years old and paying me money to shoot pellet guns at birds in your hanger. You were a rough old soul and you have played a part in who I am.
Nobody really owns anything. We give back our bodies at the end of our lives. We own our thoughts, but everything else is just borrowed. We use it for a while, then pass it on. Everything. We borrow the sun that shines on us today from the people on the other side of the world while they borrow the moon from us. Then we give it back. We can’t keep the sun, no matter how afraid we are of the dark. We borrow our food. What we eat becomes fertilizer that goes back into the earth and gets turned back into food. Everything is borrowed. Once I realized that, I stopped worrying about how I would survive. I didn’t need to have anything, I just needed to borrow.